Jesus Christ, take a look at what I noticed. I should charge them £50 an hour for this:
1. UHD & HD seasons are listed separately
You know how in Netflix, you select what you want to watch, and it will play in 4k with HDR, or 1080p, or whatever the best it can do on your TV? Yeah, well on prime (no capital P, you don’t deserve it), no such joy. 1080p for you if you wanted to watch a show without doing a search for it first!! Assuming they even put the UHD logo on correctly, which sometimes they don’t.
Root cause guess: Probably some horrible back end architecture reason why this is done. Yuck.
2. Double subtitles
If the program has a character who is unintelligible, because he blew off his face with a shotgun, they automatically show subtitles for that. BUT if you have subtitles turned on, you might get them twice.
Root cause guess: Subtitle team is sleepwalking.
3. Gibberish text in descriptions
Yes, I took as much effort is taking this photo as the Amazon crew did with writing the description. Laziness is catching.
Root cause guess: Some character set conversion issue, proof reading is not my job.
4. Subtitles over credits
Netflix (try them, they are 1/2 as shit as prime), have a way of pushing subtitles to the top of the screen to avoid this.
Root cause guess: No control over subtitle positioning/not giving a fuck.
5. Down from K on keypad doesn’t move cursor down
Down from K on the keypad moves to M, so when you try and select Space, you hit M instead.
Root cause guess: Lack of oxygen at birth.
6 to 100. I could do this for a living…
The amount of bad UI decisions is legion, here are some more:
The search is too wide horizontally, make it higher so I have to click around less. Or just go all in, and make it 30 characters across, and 1 down.
Numerous typos in subtitles. Someone’s keyboard has a faulty spacebar too, because wordsarefrequentlyconcatenated.
Whoever mixes the HDR versions of your shows needs to calm down. Turning all the dials up to max isn’t arty, it is just ugly. JCVJ is a case in point.
Fast forwarding and rewinding is clunky.
Skips credits by default, can only be changed via website. Fuck the end credit music and all those people who made the show, they don’t deserve to be known, right?
And breathe… <exhales>.